The Old Obsolete

My current predicament is simply the old habbit, the old pattren that occasionaly arise to the surface of my conciousness while Im off guard. As experience has taugth me that man cannot delete his own memories intentionally. All action that you did is written within your being. Beware my friend, there is no enemies other than yourself. And you are not yourself!

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Hey you know what, I think this is the time. I can’t take it anymore okay. Who’s the master huh?, eaten alive by his own thougth!! well its not even his own thought, it was a stray thought. A Man like himself would never do anything orginal! what a pity. Rise brother don’t be a slave in your own land. Don’t you remember? that dead is real!! and I saw a lot of dead man lately, their name filled the air for a moment and gone. Just like that. But who am I to judge?.

It is time to be a true samurai. Only between my sword and my demon, only between me and my next duel. True samurai understand the nature of time and how not to waste it! they understand the nature of mind and how to master it. They got no place for dead to enter. Such a beutiful life, a life worth living.

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It is all cringes. Everytime I looked back at my notes I feel like this can’t be me!. Now I feel my shoulder quite weary, it obviously had have enough. I remember a message told by obi-wan to anakin ‘be mindful’ hell if I know what that mean but it kind of fit.

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‘The same old evil’. The prhase is kind of okay but I don’t like the world ’evil and I belive you too. First, what is evil? I don’t know what evil is. For there is no such thing as evil in the real world, in nature, in the wild right? no evil walking around. Yes there is murderer, thieves, and all the gang but is there anything such as evil? you might say that those are evil and I understand, I don’t wanna be rude and call you blind, but you said that because you see it with a different eyes, the eyes that are full of bloatware, layer after layer. these day people are preaching about minimalism as it were a virtue of some sort, nay it simply the truth. To see what really is is to uninstall all those bloatware and see for the first time –the raw truth. Evil is evil because there is no such things as evil and you think that there is and that is the only evil –the same old evil.

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The another old obsolete bloatware that I realized is the urge to dramatize an event, to pretend to be a victim of my own doing, and somehow enjoy it. I will talk no more, for that is more of dramatization. Let me go.. further.

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LIfe is a choice? well not exactly, yes you have to draw the line somewhere but remember its only an artificial line. At the end you might notice that that too isn’t fix line. There is some force that push and pull it and it definetely not you. Then, is life a choice? yes and also no!.

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Fear explain everything. From the good to the bad. Thus, it is not about chosing the good and leaving the bad, it is about to be fearless. For fear based action is not action at all.

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There is simplicity when ‘others’ are removed from the equation. There is peace when there is no expectation. Hopes? Dreams? what is that, nature doesn’t work that way brother.

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My old pattern is always to seek answer out there and never have the courage to stand in my own feet. The new pattern however, haven’t fully form yet and that’s fine as a child need assistant wheels before go on riding a real bicycle. “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step”